Their Brains Deserve Better

I'm not a parent. I have not raised the children that come into my classroom every day. I have not watched them learn their first words or helped them to take their first step. But I have educated them, or rather, I've made (and will continue to make) my best attempt. And there's something I've noticed as these children step into and out of my classroom every day, as they take notes and read books and talk about their days or their lives or whether they feel like Gatsby was really all that great. These children need to express themselves.

Now, clearly that isn't news. Every generation since humans began walking the earth has needed to express themselves. They're human; it's a characteristic they will never lose. They need to express themselves. I need to express myself. You need to express yourself. It's factual. The concerning thing about these particular children, (and truly, too many adults come to mind as well): they don't know how. To express themselves. They. Don't. Know. How. Specifically: they don't know how to properly express what they believe, and they don't know how because they were never taught.

Sure, they know how to tell someone they're thirsty or in pain or any other simplistic notion that occurs within their body or their brain every day. But they don't understand how to tell me that they believe that green is the supreme color, the best of all the colors. If I say: why green? Why don't you think that orange is the best color? The answer, without a doubt, would be: "Orange is stupid. It's ugly. Only an idiot would think that orange is the best." But that should not be how our kids are trained to answer. Their brains should not automatically shoot to put-downs. What an absolutely tragic waste that is. What an insufficient use of their amazing minds. How sad, that our children have been taught to defend their opinions by attacking someone else's. But they have.

Your children have beautiful minds. They have brains that want to learn, that soak up every single piece of information they can. Even when you think that they don't - they listen. They listen to YOU. They hear every derogatory, malicious, venomous thing that you say, and then they repeat it. Children believe that their parents have all the answers because that's what they should believe. You assumed responsibility to mold that little mind into a good person, so when they hear their parents speak crudely, they find merit in it. They bring it to school and pass it around to their friends like it's candy. They listen to you. They trust you. Help them to use their thoughts for kindness, to explain what they believe in a way that makes others want to listen, to believe. TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO SPEAK WITH ELOQUENCE.

The minds of our youth deserve better than what they are given. If your child's favorite color is green, he deserves the ability to say that it's because that's the color that overflows from nature, that explodes in vibrant hues that he'd like to paint on every wall. He should know how to tell you that green is the color that makes him feel alive, that reminds him of summer or of Christmas trees, or that when he sees green he can taste pickles. He deserves SO MUCH BETTER than the ability to insult orange.

When we teach our children to defend themselves through insults and injury, we do them a horrible disservice. They should be able to be better, to be smarter, to be braver than that. Standing up for the things that they believe in should be standing up, not knocking down.

Teach your children to be better than that. Teach them to express themselves with eloquence. Because if they cannot do that - if they can't explain their views or defend their beliefs without simplistic insults and ignorant language, we have failed them. Because of their lack of this ability, they will suffer; their friends, educators, colleagues, spouses will all suffer. If your children cannot present themselves with eloquence their thoughts and opinions will be thrown into the barrel of ignorance and lit on fire with the rest, and that should break your heart.